The LGBTQ+ Family
January 23, 2020 | PBAT MAGAZINE
By Jia Cheng Liew, Miryam Alexandr Lucero ,Yuning Shi & Maria Ventura
“When I was 16 years old I realize that I really really like my friend Anna, like a lot. And I had a boyfriend at that time, a very cute boy, but I did not like my boyfriend so much but I really liked my friend Anna." said Ms. Dillon Paul, when asked for when she realized she might be LGBTQ.
Today Ms. Paul is a mother to a 10 years old girl and is married to a woman. She shared her experience of being in a same sex marriage with a child. Ms. Paul conducted the interview via video conference. She was calling us from her work place when she was on her break. She was very happy to participate in our interview because Ms. Paul used to be the Media Arts teacher at Flushing International High School for many years, and she was very much loved by the school community. Today, she is working in a school teaching English. Although she loved Flushing International High School, she is living in Kingston NY because she her wife wanted to live and raise their child in a place with river and more close to the environment.
LGBTQ people around the country face discrimination from many directions, religions, the government, and even the people. Recently, President Trump suggested a rule that allows the faith-based foster care and adoption agencies to continue to receive taxpayer funding, even if they exclude LGBTQ families and others from its service based on religious grounds.
Recently, the Department of Health and Human Services published the rule, which will withdraw the 2016 discrimination laws set by President Barack Obama's government, including sexual orientation and gender identity as a protected class.The rule will basically allows these childcare organizations to discriminate against LGBTQ people based on their personal religious beliefs, while allowing the government can say it didn’t prevent the LGBTQ people from adopting. The present administration are taking away many rules put in by previous administrations protecting LGBTQ people including For example in 2017 Donald Trump make a public announcement where he is saying that the United States government should not accept LGBTQ people to serve. However in 2019 the Senate and the House of Representative put a Bipartisan legislation for LGBTQ people can able to enjoy military. Also Obama put a law saying that people can use the bathroom that they feel more comfortable but the President Donald Trump reject this law because he says that was better leaving the things like before.
The LGBTQ organization Family Equality Council, Chairman Denise Brogan-Kator suggested that this new rule would have a big effect on the lives of a lot of people.
President Trump’s actions permitting discrimination of gay people by adoption services is harming not just the prospective parents but also the children. According to the Adoption Network, there are nearly 443,000 children in the US foster care system, and 60% of the children in foster care for 2-5 years before being adopted but some of never being adopted, so there are many kids need a family. But the LGBTQ people can help solve this problem, because right now many same-sex couples want to have children, so they can take care of those children.
Significantly, in 2019, have 29% LGBTQ reported want to adopt children.
Trump’s plan would have horrible consequences on the lives of many people in the country as gay marriage was recently ruled to be constitutional by the Supreme Court in the case of Obergfell v. Hodges.
Those judges justices were vote for this cases, 5-4
Right To Marriage
In 2015, there is a Supreme Court case called Obergefell v. Hodges that about groups of same-sex couples sued their relevant state agencies in Ohio, Michigan, Kentucky, and Tennessee, those states' bans on same-sex marriage or refusal to recognize legal same-sex marriages is unconstitutional. Because the 14th Amendment include Marriage rights and those rights include there is no difference between same-sex marriage and heterosexual marriage, so those states ban same-sex couple marriage is unconstitutional. The voting result is 5-4 and the same-sex couples won, in this case the most important law is the 14th Amendment, which is to give each citizen the equal protect for the Laws, so the same-sex couples have the right to marriage and adopt a child.
Right To Marriage
According to the graph the number of the married same-sex couples were increase, between 2004 and 2012 the number increase slowly but the number of the married same-sex couples were increase very fast.
Rising Public Support
Contrary to the President and those that support him on the issue, the vast majority of people support the right for same sex couples to adopt children.
This is a survey that our group did about the opinion of LGBTQ people adopt a child. In our investigation we surveyed 60 people and 46 people say the LGBTQ people should adopt a child and 14 people say the LGBTQ people should not adopt a child. Most people think they should adopt a child.'s attention, especially in short paragraphs.
Similarly, according to the graph from Gallup, the percentage of Americans that think same-sex couples should not have legal right to adopt a child has increased greatly since 1992 most people think the same-sex couples should not have the legal right to adopt a child, but when 2008, people’s opinion start change, now most people think the same-sex couple should have legal right to adopt a child.
Despite the widespread support among the public, there are still some people that oppose the right for same sex couples to have children.
Some people do not accept LGBTQ people they think their will spread homosexuality to their children. “ be a LGBTQ is a disease, and this disease is going to past to their children because that boy or girl is going to do what he/she sees in the houses, because this person when is in the alcohol or drug, because all people that does not have a God into their hearts are perverse, they are going to do perverse things in front of the children, maybe one time one of these two man can be making the food and then the other man can get into the kitchen and that man is going to touch his buttocks in front of the children and this is bad for the children.” said by Cecilio Ventura, he is a Cristian man from El Salvador he is 50 years old and he has 9 years of being part of the Christians.
Some Christians oppose gay marriage because the biblical account of sex exists between a man and a woman, while same-sex marriage violates God. Muslims oppose homosexuality, and many Muslim-majority countries criminalize homosexuality and punish. There have been many violent activities against homosexuality. For example in Orlando there had a gay dance club Pulse that shoot by an assailant on June 12, 2016 which was during the LGBT Pride weekend. And also at the same time the same shootings also happened in some other cities and towns that beyond U.S. In that events have 49 people dead.
Ms. Paul, when asked about dealing with discrimination in her life answered; "I never face distrimination, I mean that stupid people out of there who say that things. For really personally no, I mean I think I had my daughter at 2009 and of course still many people who are against LGBTQ people but in my family and my community everyone was really accepted and I think because in 2009 most people are kind know LGBTQ people have children and is not such as a surprise anymore."
Ms. Paul’s assertions are true as same sex couples with children is no longer rare in America.
"When I was with my boyfriend, I really want to have a baby and I was like 35 years old and I really want to have a baby but the reason that we separate was he wants to go get a PHD and he does not want to have a baby but I really want to have a baby so we separated is because is more important to me to do the things that I knew I really want to do. And I wasn’t let him stop me become a parent. After we separated, I was crying and crying for one year and I cry everyday and then I said is time for me to have a baby so at that time I was not with a partner and do not have anybody, but I was determined to have a baby, and I am very lucky that I got pregnant on the first but many people need to do (IVF) many times.” While Ms. Paul chose to use in vetro fertilization for her child, for many same sex couples that is not an option. For those couples that choose or need to adopt a child, the administration’s actions is saying the LGBTQ people cannot adopt a child.
In conclusion LGBTQ people have the right to have a family because "There are so many families, they may look normal but they do not love the family, maybe they are always fighting. So love is everything, and is doesn’t matter what the family looks like,” Dillon Paul. LGBTQ couples have that right to have a family and child, right now still have many orphans don’t have parents, but those LGBTQ couples can fill this vacancy. LGBTQ couples can let the orphan feel like have a family, have someone care about them and not alone.
Disclaimer: We contacted the NYCLU for a comment on the story. The NYCLU founded in 1951, this is non-profit organizations. This is a non-partisan organization of eight chapters and regional offices with more than 160,000 members across the state. They are defend and promote the Bill of Rights, the U.S. Constitution, and the New York Constitution by fundamental principles and values embodied, include freedom of speech, freedom of religion, and the right to privacy, equality and due process of law for all New York people. They believe that all New York people have inalienable rights that cannot be taken away by the government or by majority vote, and have a strong history of supporting the rights of the LGBTQ community. However, the NYCLU did not respond to our many requests for a comment.